The Strength of Love
by castlet0pia
Summary: She rolled her eyes and said, 'I'm not letting you out of my sight, Castle.' He flashed her a cheeky grin despite his headache.  'So that means you'll have to watch me sleep'


**This is just a little something that I needed, that I wrote after I watched '47 seconds' promo. **

**I hope you like it.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own it, obviously.**

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><p>Sometimes she thinks that she loves him even more than he loves her. And she knows that his feelings for her are really strong. Otherwise he wouldn't keep coming back everytime fate pulled them apart. In the first two years of him shadowing her, she fell for him slowly, fell for his charm, his smile, his overprotectiveness when it came to Alexis. She fell for Richard Alexander Rodgers, not for Richard Edgar Castle and his playboy image. Because that's really all that it was. Just an image. The ones who got the chance to know the real Rick were the lucky ones. He was always trying to help, always eager to participate in anything and everything. She couldn't remember how many times he made her laugh or smile. Basically, he just made her happy. So much. And he was still waiting for her, waiting for her heart to heal. At least she hoped so.<p>

She looked up from her paperwork at his empty chair. There was really nothing more frightening for her than the thought of him gone forever. She didn't like to look at his empty chair. It reminded her too much of the summers spent without him. The last one was her fault, she had to admit that. Although he was kind of guilty too, seeing as he dropped the I-love-you bomb right before she passed out. Seriously, they have the most terrible timing.

She heard his whistling from the break room where he was making them coffees and she smiled.

He was such a child.

But she loved that about him.

She loved everything about him.

She loved him.

She _loved _him.

Her breath caught as she was flooded with pictures of her and him, the memories of their moments playing throughout her head, reminding her of every time that something could have happened.

God, they've really wasted too much time. But she just wasn't ready yet. She was getting there, she was almost there, even though her mother's murder was still unsolved.

If she could just dive in, then maybe everything would be -

'Your coffee.' She jumped in her seat as he placed the NYPD mug on her desk.

'You okay?' She took a sip of the hot beverage and nodded.

'Yeah, fine, I'm-I'm fine.'

'You sure?' She took one more sip, then pushed the mug to the corner of her desk, grabbing her pen, trying to focus on the paperwork.

'Yeah.'

She pretended like she was reading, when in reality, she was aware of his every breath, his every move as he quietly sat down in his chair, watching her.

She knew he was watching her. Could practically feel his eyes on her. It felt kind of good actually. Having the knowledge that he liked to watch her. He could deny it, but she knew that he loved watching her. Although, as well as she knowed him, he wouldn't deny it. She smiled at the thought and looked up, saw him narrow his eyes.

'What's so funny?' She chuckled and shook her head. He was just too adorable.

Wait...

Adorable?

Okay, she might as well admit it, she's been thinking it since they first met, even when he annoyed the hell out of her.

'Beckett, did you do something to my chair?' he asked her with a fake worried face. She knew that he really wouldn't mind if she did. He'd probably laugh more than her.

'No Castle, you can relax. Not really in the mood for practical jokes after a day like this.' Her eyes searched his face, landed on a cut on his upper forehead, just below the hairline. He seemed to understand what she was thinking, because his face softened and he smiled lovingly at her.

'Hell of a day, huh?' he asked, more like stated, because it was. It was exhausting and it got them in another near-death situation. They're going to have to be more careful about that, because _now_ seriously wasn't the right time to die.

'Hell of a day,' she agreed and cocked her head to the side, studying him. 'Are you in pain?' His mouth formed a frown as he moved his chair closer to her.

'You know, I might beat the guy that tries to shoot you and then not really feel my hand and it's alright, but seriously, someone waving a knife at my head, slashing my forehead is kinda painful.' She gave him a sympathetic smile and reached up with her hand, smoothed her thumb under the cut, her fingers waving in his hair. She felt a hitch in his breath and his mouth fall open. Her hand cupped his cheek as she blinked and said, 'Thank you. If it weren't for you, I'd... Thank you, really.'

'Always, Kate.' His smile was tender, eyes full of love and unlike normally when she would have ran away, she leaned closer, flicked her eyes to his mouth, back up again, smiled and brushed her lips under the cut, right where her thumb was half a minute ago. She lingered there for a few seconds, wanting to feel his skin under her lips. She felt his eyelashes move against her chin and she knew his eyes were closed. Her lips pulled away from his forehead, moved to kiss his cheek. She leaned her forehead on his temple, her breath fanning across his ear, down his neck.

She realized that what she was doing was the opposite of what they usually did when they nearly died, but she just couldn't help herself. He pushed her out of the way when the crazy murderer wanted to cut her, like he did with his victims. Instead, he cut Castle's forehead. She found her gun on the floor and quickly shot the murderer before he could stab her partner. She didn't know how bad it was with Castle, so she quickly kneeled next to him, asking him if he got hurt anywhere else. He laughed it off and said that his head hurts, but otherwise he's feeling pretty good.

She pulled back, curled a hand around his neck, his eyes slipping open. This was it, their moment. She could dive in now and not care if she was ready or not because she knew everything would be fine. But unfortunately, Esposito and Ryan just _had _to interrupt.

'Yo, we interrupting?' Beckett and Castle quickly parted, both silently cursing.

'Yes.'

'Yes.'

Clearly the boys weren't expecting them both to answer the same, so they fell silent for a second, but continued talking.

'So, are you up for some drinks at the Old Haunt?' asked Ryan, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Esposito cast a glance at Castle's forehead, then shook his head at Ryan.

'You know what man, I don't think Castle should be drinking .'

Castle stood up abruptly, which caused him to sway, his hands flying into the air, seeking something to hold on to, finding Beckett's shoulders.

Her hands cupped his elbows to steady him, his body moving towards hers.

'Wow, you okay, Castle?'

He waited until his head stopped spinning, then dropped his hands to his sides, sitting back down in his chair.

'I'm fine, just a little lightheaded.'

She furrowed her brows and asked him, 'You sure?' He nodded and sighed.

'I think I'll pass this once, Javi. But hey, don't let that stop you from having fun, right?'

Esposito nodded, winked as he slapped his shoulder. 'Don't worry bro. Get some rest, you look like you're about to pass out.'

'Not far from it,' he complained and rubbed his temples with his fingers.

'I'll pass too, guys. You go ahead, I'm just gonna take Castle home.'

'You don't have to, Beckett. I'll take a cab, I'll be fine.'

'Stop arguing Castle and let me drive you home before you collapse on the precinct floor.'

'Okay.'

Esposito and Ryan chuckled at the exchange and said goodbye to the pair, left the precinct.

'Come on Castle, put your coat on.'

He stood up, she helped him get his arms in his coat, slipping her own jacket on.

'I think your medications are wearing off.' He snorted sarcastically and said, 'No kidding. I feel like my head's about to explode.' She took his hand and led him to the elevator, pushing the button.

'You got Tylenol at home, right?' He nodded and the doors to the lobby opened. She pulled him out of the precinct and into her car, started it and drove off.

'How are you feeling?' she asked after a few minutes of a silent drive. He looked at her and shrugged.

'I've been better.' She cast him a concerned look.

They finally arrived at his apartment building and she stepped out of the car, earning herself a curious look from her partner.

When she opened the door to the passenger seat, he asked her, 'Why did you get out of the car?' She rolled her eyes and said, 'I'm not letting you out of my sight, Castle.' He flashed her a cheeky grin despite his headache.

'So that means you'll have to watch me sleep?' She grinned back, which surprised him.

'I might just take you up on that.'

His eyes widened and he got out of the car, accepting her hand to help him. He swayed again, putting the unoccupied hand on Beckett's hip.

'You're _not_ okay. Come on, let's get you home.' She tried to step out of his hold, but he just clutched her tighter.

'I feel sick.' She took his arm and put it over her shoulders, supporting him.

'Come on, move those pretty legs of yours.' He gasped and looked at her, 'Have you just said that I have pretty legs?' She laughed and greeted Castle's doorman, stepping into the elevator.

'Wait, how do you know what my legs look like?'

She grinned and bit her lip.

'Wouldn't you like to know that, Castle.'

'I would.' He heard her laugh again as they got off the elevator and stumbled over to her door. It felt right to have his arm around her shoulders, her upper body so solid against his muscles.

'Castle, you can unlock your door now.' He looked at her amused face and pulled out his keys, unlocked the door and let her pull him in. They got rid of their jackets and shoes, then she put his arm around her once again. He tried to go towards the couch but she led him to his office instead, to the bedroom door and helped him sit on his bed, his body falling down onto the mattress, bringing Beckett tumbling down next to him.

'Castle!' She tried to move, sit up, anything, but he wrapped both his arms around her, effectively trapping her against his chest. She gave up trying to escape and sighed, stayed still for a minute to enjoy the close proximity, his scent surrounding her.

'Castle,' she started softly, 'you need to take some pills.' He groaned and shifted his legs so that hers were trapped between his own.

'Don't need them if you're here.' She froze, lifted her head to look at his face. His eyes were closed, lips curved in a gentle smile.

'Okay you're going delusional. Have you hit your head recently?' He laughed and opened his eyes, looked at her green orbs. He lifted one of his hands and burried it in her locks, pushing them behind her ear. Her lips moved closer to his.

'No. I haven't. This is me talking.' She dropped her gaze to his lips, wishing so much that she could kiss him, but her damn wall was still there.

'I think you need some Tylenol, Castle.'

She cupped his cheek and leaned even closer, their noses brushing. His eyes were focused on her lips, her thumb brushing his skin, over his bottom lip, parting his lips, his mouth lifting, but she just smirked and kissed his cheek before pushing up on his chest and shuffling in his bathroom. She opened the cupboard, found the proper pills and went back to Castle, putting them on the nightstand, walking to the kitchen and filling a glass with water. She came back to his bedroom and found him standing, unbuttoning his shirt. Her mouth went dry in an instant. He was surprisingly in a very good shape. His muscles flexed as he pulled his shirt off, throwing it over a chair in the corner.

'You know, staring is creepy.' She gasped and cleared her throat, trying to play nonchalant.

'Really, where've you heard that?' He walked over to her. He was so close, so close that if she just moved an inch closer, she could plant her lips on his throat, his collarbone, down his chest, making him-

'You're kinda staring again.' She looked up in his eyes and licked her lips, blushed.

'Um... Yeah, you - Here's your water.' She pushed the cold glass towards him, her knuckles hitting his abs, making her inhale sharply. He grinned at her, amused and grabbed the glass, trapping her fingers under his.

'Thanks.' He pulled away from her, walking over to the nighstand to take his pills.

When he emptied the glass, he pulled on a dark-gray t-shirt and lied down in his bed on the covers.

She sat down next to his lying figure on the bed, folded her right leg under her, wound her fingers in his hair near the cut on his forehead, massagging his head. He moaned, opened his eyes and put his hand on her thigh, dragged it closer to him.

'What are you doing?'

'Please, Kate?'

She exhaled and said, 'Fine,' then stretched her legs, tucking her body in his side.

'Mm, this feels really good.'

'I can't stay here all night, Castle.'

'But you said that you're not letting me out of your sight.'

'Yeah but that didn't mean cuddling with you all night.' He laughed, felt her leg wrapping around his, her hand resting over his heart.

'You lied when you told me that Coleman only hurt your forehead.' He opened his eyes suddenly and shifted his head to look at her staring back up at him. She slid her hand down over his chest and his abdomen, stopping just above the waistband of his jeans. She slowly lifted the hem of his t-shirt, exposing a white dressing wrapped over his lower abdomen.

'I didn't want to worry you.'

'Well that didn't work because I'm worrying right now.' He slowly exhaled and felt her hand settle over the dressing.

'Does it hurt?'

'Just a little.'

Silence settled over them, their breathing the only thing they could hear.

'I'm sorry,' she said, tracing circles with her fingers over his abdomen.

'What?'

'It's my fault you got hurt.'

'No Kate, it's Coleman's fault. He's the one who hurt me, not you.'

She paused for a moment.

'That's not entirely true.' He opened his eyes and pulled her chin up with his palm, so that she was looking at him.

'What do you mean?'

She looked nervous and her hand stilled, her whole body tensing.

'This summer.' That was enough for him to understand what she was talking about.

'You were hurt, you needed space, I get that Kate. It's alright, we've already had this conversation and-'

'-No, it's... It's not alright, Rick.'

He blinked and turned a bit, so he could see her better.

'I hurt you,' she continued, 'I hurt you when I promised to call but didn't. I'm sorry.'

'Stop, Kate. It's fine, I put that behind me, okay? I don't want to remember how it was when I couldn't even make sure that you were alive.' She looked away from his eyes.

'I think that one of the main reasons why I was so mad was that I thought all the time about how Josh gets to be with you, how he gets to see you, touch you every day, feel your heartbeat when I was so desperate to do that but couldn't because you shut me out. I wanted to be there for you, with you, I wanted to take care of you. I was mostly mad because of that.' She bit her lip to try and hide her smile.

'You were jealous?' He snorted and folded his hands beneath his head, staring up at the ceiling.

'Yeah, ever since I first saw him.' She propped herself up on her left elbow, looked down at him.

'Why would you be jealous?' He shrugged and it made him stretch his abdominal muscles, which she felt under her twitching fingers.

'I don't know, maybe because he was a tall, strong cardiac surgeon who saved lives daily and rode a motorcycle and I was just... Me. I couldn't compare to him, you know.'

She curled a hand under his neck, making him look at her.

'You're right. You couldn't.' The look he gave her was so hurtful that she almost cried.

'You couldn't, you can't compare to him because you're so much better.' He looked curious now and surprised, his eyes begging her to go on. She put her hand back on his abdomen, feeling his skin, the play of muscles under it.

She had to say this the right way.

'You're awfully annoying and acting like a child with your conspiracy theories, but I like that. I like it because it... Because you make me smile and laugh. You make me happy, Rick. Josh could never do that. Josh might have saved dozens of people while working as a doctor, but he never saved me. You did. Multiple times. Even before I met you. Your books helped me get through my mom's murder.'

His jaw fell open and he cupped her jaw, brushing his thumb over her smooth skin.

'Oh Kate.' She didn't let him distract her.

'And you're such a caring person. You love your daughter and your mother and that's really so sweet. Look, no matter what anybody says, you're better than Josh. You're better than Demming, better than Will, better than anyone I've ever met. You're one of a kind. And I'm so happy that I've found you, I really-'

He shut her up with a kiss, soft brushes of their lips, his hand wandering in her hair, the other supporting his weight, keeping him from crashing down to the bed.

She moaned and pulled away, her breathing uneven because of the sensation of his lips on hers.

'And you're the best kisser I've ever met.' He chuckled and let his body fall down onto the soft sheets, his now free hand wrapping around her waist, pulling her down on top of him. Their breaths mingled, eyes hungry.

'I hope you're not jealous anymore,' she said and dragged her hand up under his t-shirt towards the hollow of his throat, scratching her nails back down to his stomach. He shivered and kissed her, their mouths colliding, teeth nipping, tongues crashing together.

She couldn't believe that they were actually doing this and-

Oh.

His hand went under her sweatshirt, trailing up her spine, all the way to her bra strap. She leaned her back in his hand and he grinned in the kiss, pulled away.

'You're a pretty good kisser, too.' She narrowed her eyes and bit her lip, leaned in to whisper in his ear, 'Just a pretty good kisser?' He shuddered and found her teeth biting his lip, her tongue just barely touching his, her hands travelling up his sides under his t-shirt. He pushed his tongue against hers once, twice, before he gave up and pulled back, admited, 'God no. The best-You're the best kisser ever.' She smirked at him and brought her hand up to his hair, tugging him closer to her mouth. She kissed his chin, his jaw, the corner of his mouth, pulled his upper lip between hers, brushed her nose over his.

'I'm glad that I'm a better kisser than Serena Kay.' His eyes widened in surprise as he said with a smile, 'Oh come on, you still haven't forgotten about that?'

'You were pressing her against the wall, Castle. And kissing her passionately. And then you had her lipstick all over your mouth. Of course I haven't forgotten.'

'So it really wasn't about me being compromised. You were just jealous.'

He seemed more and more delighted.

'Yes, _and_ I was mad at you because you were kissing her after you said that you...' His eyes narrowed when she trailed off and looked away from him.

'After I said that I what?' She sighed. Maybe it was better that she tells him now. She took a deep breath.

'I heard you at the cemetary,' she said and lifted her eyes to his.

'You remember,' he stated, pushing a lock of hair behind her ear.

'I just want to know since when.' She bit her lip and closed her eyes.

'I never forgot.' She opened her eyelids, saw him smiling at her.

'I've suspected as much. You aren't exactly subtle, you know?' She was speechless. But then it suddenly strucked her. He was smiling at her.

'Wait, so you aren't mad at me?'

'I know why you didn't tell me that you remember. I understand your reasons. I _am _mad. But my feelings haven't changed, Kate. If anything, they only got stronger. I love you, Kate.' Those were the exact same words he said to her right before she lost consciousness and she was sure that her heart skipped a beat, her eyes watering. She's been waiting for this moment for so long and now she suddenly lost he ability to speak. She knew what she wanted to say, she just-

Yeah, she'll never get tired of feeling his lips on hers, softly proving his love for her. She moaned and kissed him back eagerly, trying to convey her love in the kiss. He broke away and said, 'And I love your lips, I love your hair, I love your voice, your beautiful face, I love the way you concentrate on solving the murders, I love that you always give me advice on Alexis, I love the way you walk, love the way you talk, I definitely love the way you look at me, I love your laughter, your smile, your gorgeous eyes...' He trailed off, then dragged his hand under her sweatshirt to her waist again, squeezed her, said in a low tone, 'And I just love your body. Your sexy and unbelievably hot body.' He kissed her neck, her collarbone, her shoulder, her lips.

'How's your head doing?' He groaned and tugged her down to kiss her. She broke away laughing and said, 'Castle, I seriously want to know how's your head.'

'And I seriously want to keep kissing you, so...' His fingers in her hair brought her mouth crashing down on his, even as she tried to pull back.

'Castle.' He released her lips.

'What?'

'If you're feeling alright, I should go. It's late.' He frowned, disappointment evident in his eyes, his hands leaving her body.

'Castle, I'm-'

'-running away again.' She sighed and kissed his neck, leaned her forehead on his chin.

'I'm not running anymore, Rick. I'm here to stay.'

'Then stay.' She brushed her thumb over his navel, her leg squeezing his.

'I want to, but I also want to take this slow. I don't want to mess it up.' He nodded, stroked his hands up and down her sides, brushing his fingers gently over her scar.

'I get it, because I don't want to mess this up either. But, can't you stay? I promise, no funny bussiness.'

She smiled and ran a hand through her hair.

'And what if the pain gets worse? What if I pass out and you're not here and something bad happens and-'

He was silenced with her mouth slanting over his, her hands in his hair. He sat up, bringing her with him, her legs wrapping around his waist, her arms around his neck, tongues stroking, his hands wandering up her shirt, stopping just under her bra.

His phone suddenly rang and she broke away, panting, her hips rising to stand up and pick his phone from the nightstand, but he pulled her back down, groaning when their hips collided, teeth scraping on her collarbone.

'Castle-'

'-Leave it.' He kissed her mouth again but she pulled away, looked at his still-ringing phone.

'Castle, it's Alexis.' His eyes widened and she tried to stand up again, but he had a tight grip on her. He just scooted closer to the edge of the bed, answered his phone with Kate still straddling him.

'Hey sweetie... I'm okay. How's at Paige's? What? Umm, Detective Becketts's here and... Yeah, taking care of me. Haha, very funny daughter. I will. Okay, have fun sweetie. Love you, too. Good night.'

He threw the phone on the other side of the bed and squeezed Kate's hips, one of his hands cupping her cheek, his lips softly pressing against hers.

'What did she say?'

'Oh, nothing much. She asked me why it took me so long to answer the phone and I said that you're here... I think that she actually has a pretty good idea about what was going on.'

'Is that so bad?'

'My daughter knowing what kissing is or my daughter knowing that _we're_ doing it?'

'The second one.' He smiled tenderly.

'Of course not. You're already family, Kate and Alexis loves you. If we're going to do this, then I want Alexis to know about it. I want the boys and Lanie to know about this, I want the whole world to know that I'm in love with the most beautiful woman in the world, but only if you agree with me, only if you want that, too.'

She smiled and kissed him.

'I want that. I really do. But... Maybe we could wait with the whole world and just tell our friends and families first?' She sounded so insecure. He didn't want her to ever be insecure about them, about his love for her.

'Of course, Kate. Anything you want.' Her eyes lit up and she tried to hide her beautiful, gorgeous smile by burrying her face in his neck.

'I love you so much.' Her stomach fluttered at his words and she pulled back, bit her lip and slowly closed her mouth over his, her hands wandering down to his belt, unbuckling it. He gasped and broke the kiss.

'I thought you wanted to take this slow?' She laughed and gave him a peck on the cheek, pushing him down to lie on the bed, her legs straddling him as she unbuttoned his jeans and pulled the zipper down, bit her lip.

'Get your mind out of the gutter, Castle. I'm just helping you take your pants off. You can't sleep in them.' He gaped at her and she just laughed again, tugged his jean down a little.

'Can you lift your hips, please?' she asked him in a teasing voice, felt him lift his hips up, her own hips moving in sync with his. She lifted herself up a bit, pulled his jeans off of him, her legs moving to his left side. She tucked her body close to his again, her right hand taking the previous place on his abdomen, tracing circles.

He was the first to break the silence.

'God, that might have been the sexiest thing that has ever happened to me.' She burst out laughing, her leg wrapping over his.

'Good to know,' she said when she calmed down and leaned her head on his shoulder, closed her eyes.

'I just remembered something.'

'What is it, Castle?'

'It's very uncomfortable to sleep in your pants.' She snorted.

'I had no idea, really?'

'Yeah. So if _I_ had to take them off, then _you_ have to take them off, too.' Her eyes snapped open and her head shot up, her eyes narrowing at the cocky grin on his face. His previously inactive hands dropped from her back to her hips, his thumbs curling in the belt loops, tugging.

'I'm _so _not taking my pants off, Castle.'

'Afraid you won't be able to control yourself?'

'Ah, no. I'm afraid that _you _won't be able to control yourself.' He looked up at the ceiling, pretending to be thinking it over, then he shrugged and grinned.

'You're probably right.' She rolled her eyes, but grinned back at him.

'So if you won't be taking your pants off, can you at least tell me what you're wearing under them?' She flashed him a seductive grin, pushing her index finger to the waistband of his boxers, tucking it just a little under the fabric.

'What if I'm not wearing anything?' He groaned and closed his eyes, let his hands fall to the bed, breathing deeply.

'Katherine Beckett, you will be the death of me.'

'I hope not. Otherwise you'll never know what I'm wearing under my pants, ever.' She suddenly found herself flipped over, her back pressed in the sheets by his body, his hands unbuttoning her pants, his mouth descending over hers. He pulled back too soon, but still kept his thumbs resting over her zipper, his hands gripping her hips.

'I could find out just now what you're wearing and I know you wouldn't stop me.' She licked her lips and basked in the feeling of his upper body resting on hers, his whole weight on her.

'I wouldn't,' she admitted and he smirked.

'But we're taking this slow and you were right when you said that I couldn't control myself. I wouldn't be able to stop and I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be able to either and that would go against the part when we agreed to take this slow.' She nodded and he removed his hands, slowly lifted himself up a bit, took a long look at the zipper and how tempting it was, then dropped a hand, pulled her zipper down.

She gasped and breathed, 'Slow, Castle. This is _not_ slow.' He wasn't listening to her apparently, because her kneeled on the bed to lift himself up from her and pulled her pants down a little, a few centimetres, just enough to see her panties. He slipped one thumb inside her pants, ran it over the black fabric just below the waistband, heard her take a deep shuddering breath.

'Mmm, lace.' She groaned when she heard his husky voice and felt a sudden urge to rip all his clothes off – what was left of them anyway.

'God, Castle.' He dragged his thumb lower, pressed it a bit more into her and she suddenly lost it. She sat up quickly and wrapped her hands around his thighs, pulled him down on top of her, her mouth already on his, hot and insistent. She lifted the hem of his t-shirt, tried to get it off of him, but the next thing she realized was that her pants were zipped and buttoned back up. He pulled away from her, satisfied with what he just found out and feathered his fingers across her stomach.

'Who's having trouble controlling themselves now?' She groaned and put a hand over her eyes, her chest heaving under his, her breathing ragged.

'Dammit, Castle.'

'What?' She dropped her hand and fisted it in his t-shirt like the other one.

'You just - I thought you were going to - Ugh.' He laughed, the sound so rough and smooth at the same time, just like she thought he would be when they first –

'Remember Kate, slow. I just had to test you. May I say that you have an incredibly small amount of self-control?' She huffed.

'It's your fault.' His eyes sparkled and he seemed uncertain with something before he spoke up.

'How long since you've last had sex?'

'Ex_cuse_ me?' She really, _really_ couldn't believe that he was asking her this.

'How long, Kate?' She hesitated a second, then answered him.

'Almost a year. I… Before the shooting was the last time I…' He seemed satisfied with her answer.

'So, you haven't been with anyone since then?'

'Of course not.'

'Why not?'

'Because I was in love with you.' His mouth dropped open and she smiled at him, leaned up to kiss him lightly. She pulled back and said with a big smile on her face, 'I love you, Rick.'

He hummed and closed his eyes, kissed her softly.

'Love you too,' he managed to say between the kiss and she grinned, pulled away.

'And you?'

'Me?'

'How long's it been for you?' He thought for a moment.

'Almost sixteen months.' She gasped in surprise.

'Seriously?'

'Yeah. It's like torture.'

'So you haven't been with anyone since Gina, then?'

'No. Even Gina was a mistake.'

'Why?'

'She was mostly just a distraction for me to get over you. But I couldn't, no matter what.' She bit her lip and closed her eyes.

'I wanted to come with you.'

'But instead you went with Demming. It's okay, Kate.'

'No, I didn't go.' He seemed confused.

'What? But you turned me down because you were going to spend the weekend with him.'

'I broke up with him to say yes to you.' His mouth fell open.

'Wha-What?'

'I tried to tell you, but you've already invited Gina.' He closed his eyes, his jaw clenched. He looked like he was angry with himself.

'God, I was so stupid. I'm sorry, Kate. We've lost all this time because I screwed it up.' She shook her head.

'No, Rick. If we started that summer, then it maybe wouldn't last. We went through so much together, this past year and a half. It got us closer than ever and it's fine, it's better that we didn't dive in back then.'

'Still, I'm such an asshole.' She grinned at him.

'No, you're not.' He kissed her again and then rested his forehead against hers.

She ran a hand through his hair, tugging on it a bit so that he'd look at her. He did.

'What?'

'You're tired. You should get some sleep.'

'We both need to get some sleep.' She bit her lip and nodded.

'But not before you change into something more comfortable. You really can't sleep in your pants.' She chuckled and stood up with him. He found her one of his shorter boxers and a blue t-shirt, left her to go to the bathroom to change.

She emerged 4 minutes later, teeth-brushed. Not that he was counting. He really wasn't. His phone was.

He whistled and wrapped his arms around her waist.

'Well hello there, pretty woman. What's your name?'

'It's a secret.'

'I like secrets.'

'If I told you, I'd have to kill you.'

'You wouldn't kill me. You love me too much,' he said grinning and locked his lip with hers. She broke the kiss after a few seconds and said.

'You're probably right.' He chuckled and took her hand, led her to the bed. They settled down in the middle, both already absolutely sure that they'd drift to each other in sleep if not before, so they gave up to the temptation of being close right away. They tangled their legs, her back against his chest, and slowly exhaled, content.

'This is one of the best days in my life.'

'You got cut today, Castle. By a psychopath.'

'Yeah, but if you leave that out, we made out, almost did something more, you told me you loved me, we cleared some things out, we're cuddling right now, so I'm really not complaining. Plus, if I haven't gotten cut than we wouldn't be here right now.'

'True.'

They both yawned and laughed.

'We should really get some sleep.'

'Yeah.

'I love you.' He smiled and kissed her hair.

'I love you too, Kate.'

'Night Rick,' she said on a yawn and snuggled her back closer to him. He pressed her more into him with his hand on her stomach and sighed.

'Until tomorrow, Kate.'

There was a whole new world of possibilities waiting for them outside. Many more days had yet to happen and now that they knew what they meant to each other, they'd get through everything.

Unfortunately, there was another secret lurking in the shadows, waiting to destroy them.

* * *

><p><strong>I know that Castle's reaction was a bit out of character, but I seriously don't like to watch a cold Castle, pulling away from Beckett and dating a blonde bimbo.<strong>

**Seriously Andrew Marlowe? **

**Let me know what you think.**

**- Ariela**


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